Objavljeno 08.12.2020.

Kako se postaviti kada bolja polovica ne želi biti intimna

Bez obzira jesi li friško u vezi ili si s partnerom u braku godinama, svaka veza može u nekom trenutku izgubiti bliskost. U romantičnoj vezi to predstavlja gubitak seksualne intimnosti.

Seks je važna komponenta zdrave romantične veze i to je ono što razlikuje ljubavnike od prijatelja.

Kako se postaviti kad tvoj partner više ne želi biti intiman s tobom?

Znaj kako to ne predstavlja kraj veze, potrebno je ići korak po korak ka ponovnom povratku intimnosti u odnosu. U zdravoj vezi vrijedi se potruditi, a pristup rješavanju ovog problema nije da 'popravite' partnera nego pronalazak međusobnog razumijevanja i poštovanja.

Prije nego napadneš partnera zato što je seksualno nezainteresiran, definiraj si pojam bliskosti! Bitno je da ti i tvoj partner imate istu definiciju bliskosti pa kada i dođe do nedostatka intimnosti da imate isto mišljenje o tome što vam znači.

Intima je iz stajališta pojedinaca različito definirana, za jednu osobu ona može predstavljati često eksperimentiranje u području seksa, a za drugu romantično izležavanje u zagrljaju voljene osobe.

Kako bi riješili svoj problem intimnosti u vezi ključ je iskrena komunikacija bez predrasuda. U normalnoj komunikaciji nema mjesta za okrivljavanje niti samog sebe niti partnera.

Kada se nađete u neprilici nedostatka intimnosti, pravo je vrijem da pitate partnera koliko je zaista zadovoljan u vezi koju imate?

Ne zaboravi kako vanjski čimbenici poput stresa, loše prehrane, problema sa snom, konzumacije alkohola, tableta ... mogu u velikoj mjeri negativno utjecati na libido. Ako neki od ovih čimbenika pogađa tvoju bolju polovicu, znaj kako ona možda osjeća sram i teško joj je o tome pričati. Zato je razgovor na prvom mjestu!

Čak i kada možeš pretpostaviti što muči partnera, najbolje je pitati i slušati. Kada partner ogoli svoje probleme pred tobom u potpunosti ti vjerujem, a tada si na pravom putu...

Uložite zajedničke napore 'u više dodira' - držite se za ruku i grlite jer je moć neseksualnih dodira podcijenjena. Što više primamo dodira to više mozak oslobađa oksitocina te se osjećamo mirno i sretno. Uložite u neseksualne dodire kao u jedan od novih oblika intimnosti.

Uz dobru komunikaciju i međusobno poštovanje, ulaganje energije u neseksualne dodire siguran je put do seksualne intimnosti kada se partner (bez prisile) bude osjećao spreman.

Foto: freepik
A.Đ.H.





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